Random Banter on Backbends and Hips

I have recommitted to my practice. I owe some of this newfound enthusiasm to a gigantic water-bottle that I picked up at 7eleven. I know you are supposed to use water as a tool and not as a crutch, but that crutch has totally helped me to recommit.

A couple notes.

Backbends.

Camel Pose- I am a sloucher. I let my shoulders slump forward for every occasion and Camel takes every single one of the muscles that bend forward when I slouch (which is all the time) and bends them the opposite way. In Ustrasana you are literally pushing your heart against your chest, and as I push forward with my ass squeezed tight like a coconut, I can do anything. It was not always this way. Ustrasana requires so much effort and positivity while I crawl to its setup on my hands and knees. Its rewards are glorious.

Half Moon Backbend- This posture still eludes me. If I go far back and look at the wall behind me, I hinge on the wrong joints so I supposed that I am not ready to go far back. I keep waiting, impatiently for a breakthrough but it never comes. I am so stiff there.. what gives? Oh, and get this, I can do a backbend (gymnastics style).

Hips.

I actually singled out my hips during Eagle Pose yesterday. Behold the mind-body connection. I was able to move into 'dem hips' and adjust them, soo cool (at least for a yoga dork).

Final Spinal- I feel my hips stretch here and it wasn't until over a year of consistant practice that this connection was formed. This is why you don't sit on your heal when you are setting up in that posture. After a teacher adjusted me in this posture and then asked if I felt it in my hips (I was dumbfounded and my eyes undoubtedly went cross-eyed as I furrowed my brow). Hips? What? Two classes later, bam.

Triangle- with all of the heavey breathing and internal nursery rhymes I sing to my body during this posture to stay in it, my hips are actually being stretched too. Is there no end to what this posture does to my sweaty body?

Part 1: Standing Series: After 1 year and a 30 day challenge this is where I'm at.

Standing Deep Breathing -Pranayama - In this posture, my back and shoulders resist my first attempts at movement. When breathing out my elbows struggle against lifting toward the ceiling while keeping my chest lifted. Breathing in, I enjoy the way my stomach and chest stretch both in the mirror and within. I either find myself smiling by the end of it, or I breeze through the the posture. Some days my legs feel strong and capable like a centaur, but when I look in the mirror they don't match the feeling. There is no in between for me with this one. I either enjoy it or don't, it was never just ok.

Half Moon Pose- Ardha-Chandrasana with Pada- Hasthasana- My expression of this posture (side to side) is powerful and strong. I am a flower petal blooming and I ground the posture from me feet to my fingertips. My eyes follow the curve of my body in the mirror as I visualize a crescent moon. My right side is stronger and more flexible than my left. I often feel a pinching in the left side of my back in this posture. This is not the same type of pinch that happens when I don't lift up through the chest. The pinch is in the same place I carry my stress, the same place I pull my muscles repeatedly. This posture does give me energy for the rest of class and I am constantly reminding myself that pushing in this posture will not wear me out, but will pump me up. When I bend over to grab my feet, on flexible days, I can straighten my legs and I more often than not enjoy the posture. After first set, no matter how hard I try in the posture, coming up in the finale is like a breath of fresh mountain air.


Awkward Pose- Utkatasana This posture is rarely hard for me to hold. The first part, I sometimes don't really get. i do it, and open my chest but don't really see the point of the posture... what I am saying is that I don't really see the yoga in it. This second part of the posture on the tippie toes, I do get but my body doesn't. It is always a struggle for me to bring my hips forward and my upper body back. I see this as more of a 'structural' problem that is slowly correcting itself over time with a little push from me. Always trying always improving. Instructors often tell me to lean back.. I KNOW I am not leaning back in perfect alignment and it is because my body is not ready. At least this is how I see it. The third part of the posture, I enjoy visualizing 3x 90degree angles and pretend that I am the box. I don't bounce because my knees suck. This posture is supposed to be good for cold feet. I have yet to see the benefits of that because my feet are always cold.

Eagle Pose- Garurasana I love this posture. Connecting with my breath, inhales and exhales iare so beautifully self explanatory in this posture. I carry all of my happiness, sadness, stress, life in my upper back muscles and I relish the moment I swing my arms one under the other, then pull down to connect with those muscles. Sometimes when I am really hot and class seems to be an enormous effort, I just stay in that first part and feel my shoulder muscles stretch. In Bikram's book he says that you should press wherever you feel pressure in this posture and I remind myself of this while I am in it. This posture is so dynamic with so many places to focus on.

Standing Head to Knee- Dandayamana-Janushirasana My standing leg burns and my lower back is always sore after this one. 1 year and a 30 day challenge later and I still kick out only occasionally. As long as that standing leg is strait, you get the benefit so what is the rush right? I am plenty challenged holding the posture and not falling out- while not kicking. Sometimes I am able to kick out, the left leg kicks out easier than the right one and in this posture I am painfully aware of how my legs and hips were put together funny. I am constantly working on this one, I am only now finding peace in it.

Standing Bow Pose Dandayamana-Dhanurasana Strength, focus, laughter. I refuse do get frustrated when I fall out of this one, it is a decision that I made from the beginning and one that I plan to stick to. Lately this posture has been very solid. My left side is not as flexible but seems to have better alignment. My right side is more flexible and I enjoy going to my edge. Not much else in that hot room is as gratifying as holding this posture for the full 60 seconds. When teachers stand in the front row, I gape at how beautiful this posture is. This is the posture that first helped me to understand what an 'asana' was. This stillness I find in this posture transcends my ego and holds my Self.

Balancing Stick- TuladandasanaI am strong and capable in this posture. Aware of my body, balance, and alignment, I work on tightening. This is the most fun posture for me to watch when I sit out. All the bodies! Everyones uniqueness comes through, tall, small, apples, oranges, broken umbrellas are funny.

I am still a student

Every once in a while, I stumble upon an idea that taps into this great energy. It goes something like this; positivity gives positivity in all rightness. It is an endless energy of circular proportions in my mind. I am reading a book on Ayurvedic Medicine, an introduction to. In my mind it is the concept of 'Pure Awareness'. It is how I rationalize my presence on this earth.

Regardless of whether or not you understand what I am trying to say above... here is a good point. We take much for granted. If I just stopped and said, 'My practice right now is all that I ever hoped it would be, and I am so grateful for it.' My life would be much more peaceful. My mind at rest. I guess in simple terms an appreciation of here and now is missing.

I want to stop grasping at the great energy of my ramblings in the first paragraph above, and just accept it's existence in my life.

"Many of us grew up with the belief that achieving success requires relentless hard work, grim determination and intense ambition. As a result, we may have struggled for years and even reached some of our goals but wound up feeling exhausted, our lives out of balance...such desperate striving isn’t necessary or even desirable. In the natural world, creation comes forth with ease. A seed doesn’t struggle to become a tree―it simply unfolds in grace." >- Deepak Chopra on the seven spiritual laws of success.

8PM class was humid. I am moving forward in my practice with deeper asanas and better control over the chaotic energies that I feel during the day. I had a different instructor today, he was just what I have been missing. He was hard on us and I needed it. He directed our focus as a class to set our pace/motivation during Pranayama Series and really tapped into our group energy to push and push and push. He reinforced a forgotten tip for Garurasana (Eagles Pose). Stick your butt out farther than you think you should while bringing your chest up to create the c-curve in your spine. On a separate note of progress, I lifted my left heal up with strength and flexibility to spare during Janushirasana with Paschimotthanasana (Head to Knee Pose).

I guess the themes of this post are two opposing energies. Hard-work versus acceptance. I am struggling with finding a happy median between the two.

It is good for you.

My legs twisted like a pretzel today in Garurasana (eagles pose). I have always been capable of compressing them with toes hooked on calf, but never able to point my toes down.. today I am one step closer. I find that I can only fully engage in this pose when I consciously tighten my stomach muscles. What a difference this makes, without tightening my muscles I look like a fat pigeon. With tightened stomach muscles, I am proud. I especially enjoyed the sensation of pulling down on my elbows today. My elbows are the key to loosening up my shoulders and upper back. I think these are called the the trapezius muscles.

I can confidently look forward during Tuladandasana (balancing stick pose). I started by focusing on the logo on my towel until one day and instructor said, "Kirsten look forward" <-- I fell. Then I began glancing forward occasionally. Now I am able to look forward for the full ten seconds of glory that is Tulandandasana.


Padangustasana (toes stand) is forever a challenge for me. My knees are weak and so is my mind. When I attempt the pose my knees feel like they are too small for my body. Today I did not push myself far in this asana.

Is it possible to be too proud in Trikanasana (triangle pose)? My chest broke free towards the ceiling, I felt so strong as my arms pulled me in opposite directions, but after coming out of the pose my back felt wrong. I hold my stress, worries, and concerns, in my back muscles. What is my body telling me today? My mind told my body to stop but an instructor once said that too often we stop at the first sign of discomfort when our body is perfectly capable of working through it. I was not able to do that today. Ouch.